A TESTIMONY
Just a few days after Memorial Day, and just as we were putting the final touches on the new GFFA website, I awoke in the middle of the night with a pain that began in my back and moved around my waist, into my belly and up under my ribs. By early in the morning, the pain was absolutely unbelievable. Since Shawn and I were based out of Geneva, Ohio at the time, we ended up in the University Hospital's Genevea Emergency room early that morning.
After having several tests run with nothing to show, they gave me a shot of something that took away the pain and knocked me out. Later that day I left the ER with a prescription for pain medication and a hope that what had awakened me so suddenly would not re-appear.
Thus began what I can only refer to as an odyssey that lasted from that day until just a few days before Father's Day. I can still hardly believe that we lost almost a month out of our lives!
I don't want to bore you with (or remember myself, for that matter) all of the details. Let me just say that for the better part of a month I was either in the hospital under the influence of some really strong narcotics, or I was at home writhing in severe pain. I spent a week under the care of some tremendous doctors and nurses at St.Joseph's in Warren until after virtually every test that they could think of to run had turned up no results. They finally ran one last test and found out that even though I had no gall stones, my gall bladder had in fact shut down and had to come out. They performed that surgery on a Thursday afternnon and sent me home to Newton Falls to recuperate on Friday afternoon. By Saturday I was feeling pretty good so we traveled back to our camp in Geneva where I was determined to have a fast recuperation and get back to working on the final issues that had to do with our new website release. Well, that was the plan.....
On Saturday night, I was once again awakened by severe pain in my lower back which now radiated down my right leg into my knee. This pain was a constant pain with rippling spasms that caused me to literally almost jump out of bed. Over the next few weeks we were running back and forth to the ER, submitting to more tests, and praying like mad trying to determine what was causing the pain. All the while, I was being given stronger and stronger pain meds, both in and out of the hospital. I should mention at this time that I am an addict. I have been clean for almost 28 years and subjecting my body and mind to the narcotics was extremely disturbing to me.
Finally, after almost four weeks, I was referrred to a pain specialist from University Hospitals who ordered another MRI, believing that I had somehow come out of surgery with a pinched nerve somewhere in my spine. He was going to locate where the nerve was pinched and give me a shot in my spine to alleviate the pain. He also gave me shots directly into the muscles in my leg to attempt to give me some relief.
Alas, all of this failed! The MRI showed nothing wrong and could not provide the Pain Specialist with any direction as to how to treat my pain. I was once again sent home with pain medications which did nothing to stop the pain, but kept me in a constant altered state.
I am a man of faith and what everyone who knows me would say am an optimist. I had however by this time become totally exhausted, physically, mentally and emotionally. Shawn, as well was at the end of her strength. I had fallen into the depths of despair and was asking the Lord to give me relief or allow me to just die. I have never been so low in all of my life! I was receiving no relief from the constant pain and was not hearing any answers to my prayers asking the Lord, "WHY?"
During the last week of my ordeal, a dear lady named Connie Gentry from Sturgis, Michigan heard a word from the Lord and called Shawn to send a message to me. She told Shawn to give me Psalm 13. Shawn came into our room after speaking with Connie and told me what she said. She then began to read to me from The Message,
"Long enough, God - You've ignored me long enough. I've looked at the back of your head long enough. Long enough I've carried this ton of trouble, lived with this stomach full of pain. Long enough my arrogant enemies have looked down their noses at me. Take a good look at me, God, my God;"
As Shawn read this to me, I said to myself, and to God, "Yes, that indeed is where I am!" And Shawn continued to read,
"I want to look life in the eye, So no enemy can get the best of me or laugh when I fall on my face. I've thrown myself headlong into your arms - I'm celebrating your rescue. I'm singing at the top of my lungs, I'm so full of answered prayers."
As I heard that part, my spirit cried out to God, "That's exactly what I need. God I have the first part, give me the second part." In my weakness and despair, God had given me something to hold onto, and a glimmer of hope came back to me!.
All through my ordeal it seemed that 3 am was the "witching hour". I would awaken each night around that time with the pain in my body having a firm grip on me that no amount of pain medication would alleviate. I was simply in its grip and nothing I could do would bring me relief.
On the Friday night before Father's Day I went to bed. Once again at about 3 am I awoke and lay still in fear of the pain. It was not very long however before I realized that no pain was there! I began to slowly move around, and still...NO PAIN! I lay there all night long praising God, not wanting to wake Shawn as it was the first night in four weeks that she was able to sleep the night through. When we got up in the morning, we had quite a time going back and forth between laughing and crying as we praised God together for my healing. To quote an old friend of mine, "I felt like I had been let out of a shoe box in the middle of a parking lot!"
That Saturday morning, I once again asked the Lord, "Why?" Many who know me will tell you that I am sometimes a little stubborn. Many more will tell you that I am a lot stubborn! My Lord, who knows me better than anyone knew that some things He had to say to me I would not hear unless He had my udivided attention. He got it in a way that only He could! He has been speaking to me about many things since that day, and I am praying daily that He helps me to be open to the things that He is speaking.
I want to share one main thing that He has made very real in my life. There is a song that speaks about the Lord looking down on us in our trouble and saying, "Enough!" I believe that is exactly what happened in my case. And God brought home the truth to me that while He has blessed us with many talented people in our lives, like doctors, or lawyers, or friends and family to lean on, it is His desire for us to place our trust in Him alone! He brought me to the place where there was no hope but Him, and until I came to the place where I recognized that fact, there in fact was no hope.
I ask you to celebrate with us His marvelous provision of healing in my body. I need to tell you as I told my doctors that this in fact was a touch from the Lord. They were trying to explain to me that either the nerve became un-pinched (that would be the one that they could not find) or that the pain medications just finally started to work, I just had to ask them...are you ready for this? Which of the pain medications took away the difficulties that I have had in my right knee and hip for the past two and a half years? That's right - in all of this, God blessed me with a new right hip and knee at the same time He took away my pain, and I don't have any scars! It literally took me almost three days to learn to walk again after all of this due to the fact that the right side of my body has been completely rebuilt by the Great Physician!
I am writing this to let you know today that if you are in a place where there seems to be no hope that you can "throw yourself headlong into His arms", and in His time, He will look down on your situation and say, "Enough!" You can then celebrate His rescue!
Praise the Holy Name of the One, True God! I thank Him and testify to His Great Love for us!
In closing, there are some others that I would like to thank:
For all of you who sent words of encouragement and let us know that you were praying - please know that your love and support helped us to make it through to the time of our deliverance - we love you very much and ask that the Lord bless you for your faithfulness in standing with us!
Our Staff - God bless each one of them! Heidi, Scott, and Wendi especially who got really "dumped on" as they picked up our load and carried it forward, doing everything that their jobs entail, and ours as well. WELL DONE! Faithful Servants of the Lord!
Once again, Connie Gentry, for your obedience to deliver what was surely a Word from the Lord to us in a very dry place. We can't wait to finally meet you and put our arms around you. Until then, consider yourself hugged real good!
Chris Jakubowicz and all the folks at Elexio, our Web Service Provider for going above and beyond the call of duty to make sure that we hit our release deadline. You guys and gals are awesome and we appreciate you very much.
Last, but certainly not least, my dear wife, Shawn, who stood beside me through it all. God has surely blessed me with a life-partner who is dedicated to our Lord and those whom she has been given to care for. I love you with all my heart!
Much Love To You All!
Pastor Dane